We’ve been talking about reconciliation, with ourselves before we speak about reconciliation with others. Remember –reconciliation is about balancing different things. Like in accounting or in finding a way of living in harmony with people who are different from you.
Last time we spoke about the cultural values, that was so dominant at one stage, that was all about our role in helping others in our family or village survive or thrive. That’s is how we got our sense of meaning and belonging. Compared to the values of today that are often about me, me, me and more me. (Outward looking versus inward looking.)
We spoke about how this can end up with us having a lack of balance between what we think will make us happy – the me stuff – and what we were created to do and be – the common good stuff.
How being out of balance with ourselves is understandable … many people never adjust this lack of personal reconciliation (which makes them discontent) with a way of living in their own world, that would give them a much better chance of being contented.
Being reconciled with ourselves is…
Being reconciled with the messages that we carry with us as a result of our childhood – parenting, family, friends, school.
No matter how good our parents were at their role in caring for us, no matter how good our family, friends or school, we’ve got at least one voice inside of us that reminds us of why we aren’t good as we could be, why we are bad, all the mistakes we’ve made.
It might say “.. don’t speak up because ….. you are always wrong…. ” Have you got one of these voices? .. I’ve got two … what that shouts the negative and another whisper that is encouraging.
This is the “voice” of what we think of ourselves. How do you deal with your voice?
This is another form of reconciliation with ourselves that we should consider addressing before we move on to how we reconcile with others.
Over the next period, I’m going to talk through how to listen to your voice/s.
More from Allan Tranter on Reconciliation: