Reading Time: 3 minutes

Amanda Viviers | 98five blogger

It was late one night between Los Angeles and Sydney that I broke down on a twelve-hour flight. I hoped that the random stranger next to me was asleep and the anonymity of the sky could envelop me.

I was reading a book that was picked up in a hurry as I boarded my flight. Things I Want My Daughter to Know by Alexandra Stoddard. Tears flooded my face, out of sheer exhaustion of hoping.

I scribbled in the front of the book, “Dear Daughter, one day I want to hold you, one day I want to be a Mum and, yes, there are so many things that I want to tell you.”

Dear Single Self part two Amanda Viviers

This book had leapt off the shelf and if I had known the content in detail I definitely would have left it behind. My heart was sore from waiting and I was wanting inspiration in the form of a three-point formula.

Fast forward ten years and on December 1 I’m releasing my latest book with the epilogue contains the letter I penned into the future to my daughter.

Retrospect is a powerful tool.

Have you ever read anything that is full of wisdom from the experience of another?

I wrote a letter that day on the plane, from years of exhaustion, times of doing too much without enough time resting. It was the beginnings of a seed — a dream that would be only realised a decade later.

If you were to write a letter to your future or even more profoundly to your past releasing it, what would you say?

Here is a segment from the letter to my daughter Liberty:

This is the one thing about humanity and especially being a woman that I find so deeply disturbing. We are all unique and beautiful in so many different ways. Yet we spend our money and days trying desperately to be accepted. We change our appearance to look like everyone else. From surgery to extreme practices, to diets and manipulations. We covet other women’s lives and looks, then wonder why we are so unhappy.

My prayer for you, my beautiful girl, is not that you would never feel the pain of regret and lessons learned because these are the moments from which I have grown and learned in the years that I have been graciously given.

My prayer is this…
That you would find the absolute brilliance in being you.

That you would discover the women who fought so many years ago so you can vote and not take that gift for granted. 

Alexandra Stoddard encouraged me that night on the plane with this thought also:

You can’t be a resource for others unless you nourish yourself. 

My question for you today, is how are you treating yourself?

If you were to write a letter to yourself, what would be the tone? Would it be full of grace or judgement?

Today, take the time to remind yourself of the promise of yesterday and the faithfulness of prayers that have been answered. Also take the time to invest in your future and reignite hope for that which is to come.

Lamentations 3:25-29 helps me often with this:

God proves to be good to the man who passionately waits, to the woman who diligently seeks.
It’s a good thing to quietly hope, quietly hope for help from God.

It’s a good thing when you’re young to stick it out through the hard times. When life is heavy and hard to take, go off by yourself. Enter the silence. Bow in prayer. Don’t ask questions: wait for hope to appear.

I’d love to read the wisdom found in your letter to yourself, email me at and together let’s refresh our hope with the retrospect of wisdom gained from each other.

Amanda’s book Dear Single Self is due out December 1.

online-use_amanda-viviers-profile-photo_updated-sept2016Amanda is a writer, speaker, creative coach, wife of Charl and novice Mum to Maximus and Liberty. She’s published three books and can be found in her beach shack, writing her fourth. Her daily blog is a Christian Media & Arts Australia best digital media project award winner. Amanda is a presenter on radio across New Zealand and Australia and is the co-founder of Kin Women; a network created to inspire women. Along with her husband, she is co-owner of surf brand, Maximus and Liberty. They manufacture surfboards, stand up paddle-boards and merchandise to fund youth surfing projects globally. Driven by a passion for social justice, Amanda loves supporting projects for children in developing countries. Teaching children to live creative lives, beyond the circumstances, is something she pursues daily. | Follow Amanda on Facebook | Instagram | Twitter | Pinterest

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